Sunday morning was hell. That morning I’d been molested by John a sixty-somethng year old man who I had thought was my friend and had invited into my life along with Jeff the man who I had an intense crush on and who I considered an extremely close friend,
That morning, Lesley, my private duty aide that came in to take care of me every morning and every night, came in earlier than the 10 O’Clock she was planning on coming in at anyways. She came in around 9:30 after my mom gave her an emergency phone call letting her know what had happened.
Marina, the overnight staff at the Assisted Living Side had been over to check on me and offered to wash me up, but I was terrified to get naked in front of anyone that hadn’t already seen me naked, after the events with John earlier that morning, plus I was so paralyzed with overwhelming anxiety and other emotions I wasn’t sure that I could even name, that I wasn’t sure I could even move. Also, I didn’t want to get Marina in trouble for being over at my apartment when she wasn’t supposed to leave the main building as I was part of the Independent Living section, not the Assisted Living Section.
When Lesley arrived, the sound of the key in the door got my heart pounding again.
“Who is it?” I squeaked out, as loudly as I could manage.
“It’s Lesley,” she called in.
I was able to let out the breath that I hadn’t realized I’d been holding.
Lesley pushed me into the bathroom, coaxed me out of the wheelchair and onto the shower chair, and scrubbed me down. She used extra Dove body wash on my stomach and foot per my request and then got me dressed and all of my usual morning med routine done. The whole time she spoke in soft reassuring tones, reminding me that this was not my fault.
“We will get through this,” she told me. “What he did was a very bad thing, but it was not your fault in any way, shape, or form. He is a very bad man, he was very wrong. We will figure out a way to get you feeling better and get this situation taken care of. Once we get over to the main building we have to talk to Chrissy or Eve and let them know exactly what happened and figure out what the next steps in the situation will be. We have to get you some sort of resolution, he can’t just do this to you and get away with this.”
I just nodded and set my chin forward as I tried not to cry. Lesley’s plan sounded good and it was right on target with my mom’s plan so everyone was on the same page.
Once we got to the main building Lesley brought me to the basement to find Chrissy. I was hoping to speak to Chrissy because she was way more kind and gentle than Eve and I knew she would be more understanding about the whole situation. Unfortunately, we didn’t even make it all the way to the office before we were intercepted by a very upset and frazzled-looking Eve.
“I need to speak with you Rebecca,” Eve told me sternly.
My heart felt like it gained about 50 pounds and then sped up to about 200 beats per minute, I knew I was about to get in trouble and I wasn’t sure exactly why, but I had a feeling it had something to do with what had happened with John this morning and I had no idea how it had gotten back to her already.
“Okay,” I told her, but my voice came out in a whisper.
“I can’t hear what you just said,” Eve snapped at me. “You’ve got to speak up.”
“I just said ok,” I told her again.
“Did you call your social worker at Hillcrest Commons and tell her you are being sexually molested here?” she asked me in a demanding tone of voice.
“No,” I told her, “I – “
She cut me off.
“That’s funny because I just got a call from your social worker there saying you’ve made reports that you were sexually molested by John here at Side By Side.”
“Well I did tell my friend who I know from Hillcrest Commons, she’s the daughter of a resident there, about how earlier this morning John did sexually molest me and it was really traumatic for me because I have a sexual abuse history,” I explained.
“How did he get into your apartment?” Eve asked me.
“Well he knocked on the door and said he was going to help me fix the internet, so I let him in,” I told her. My voice was shaking and I couldn’t look her in the eye, instead, I was staring at my bear Softia who was resting in my lap on my wheelchair.
“He came over by himself at 8 AM to fix your internet on a Sunday morning?” Eve asked me, sounding like she didn’t believe me.
“That’s what he told me. I asked him if we could do it later, but he was pretty insistent that he was there now and wanted to just get it over with”. I said.
“Was anyone else in the apartment when you let him in?” Eve asked me.
“No,” I told her. “I’d been planning on sleeping in until 10 AM, he woke me up by knocking on the door,”
“So you let a man you’ve only known for a week into your apartment when no one else was around?” Eve asked me.
When she put it like that I felt like an idiot, but I had thought I could trust John. Standing there talking to Eve, I started to realize about all of those times I thought he was listening to me so intently as I spoke, he had actually been staring at my chest. He had kept bringing up playing strip checkers like he wanted me to join in the game with him and Debbie, all the pieces were fitting in my head now, only now it was too late.
“Well, now thanks to you, we’re probably going to have to undergo some kind of inspection, depending on what authorities your social worker over at the nursing home has contacted about this. I also heard that you had Marina come over to your apartment this morning.”
My heart gained another 50 pounds ( I was going to have to put that thing on a serious diet!). How did she find that out too?
“Marina works at the Assisted Living part, she can help you to an extent when you’re over here at the main building, but under no circumstances are you ever to have her come to your apartment again. I don’t care what happens. You had her leave a bunch of dementia patients unattended for half an hour, do you know how much trouble we could have gotten into with the state if our dementia patients wandered off and got hurt because our aide wasn’t on-site and was busy at the Independent Living side helping a girl who doesn’t know how to behave around men?” Eve said to me.
I couldn’t help it, I broke down and started sobbing.
“Crying is not going to get you anywhere with me,” Eve told me.
I just cried harder, I couldn’t control it, I was just too upset, this was all just too much. I was on sensory overload.
“Becca didn’t mean to cause any problems,” Lesley stood up for me. “We’ve established that there was an incident and it was bad, Where do we go from here?”
“Well, first of all, if you want to stay here at Side By Side you have to promise that you won’t go to the police about this. We could get shut down for something like this and then you wouldn’t have anywhere to go. Second of all, you are not allowed to have any men in your apartment ever again. Third, we’re going to have to have a meeting with you and John to sit down and work things out. If you want your parents can be there and Lesley can be there, but we have to have this meeting to set things right. Oh, and you can’t tell another soul what happened with you and John, understand?” Eve asked me.
I just nodded while studying Softia’s paws. It was too scary to look at Eve’s face. I was still crying, but not as hard.
“Okay, well, Becca’s mom will call you to set up the meeting, I’ll take Becca upstairs,” Lesley told Eve as she began rolling me toward the elevator. I was so grateful to Lesley for getting me out of there that I didn’t dare move until I got in the elevator.