I had been at Hillcrest Commons (Or as I liked to refer to it, Hell-Crest Commons) for 3 months. Jillian, the nurse practitioner overseeing my care, decided that we needed to have a meeting with all of my care team and my parents.
The meeting was an absolute disaster.
Every time I tried to talk to Jillian she insisted that my disease wasn’t as bad as I said it was and that she could get me off of most of my meds, off of the IV fluids, get my port removed, get me eating again, get my GJ tube removed, and get me walking with no assistive devices. She had shared this viewpoint with my parents and got them so full of hope that they were willing to do just about anything with me or to me in order to get me there.
Life is a funny thing, you squeeze onto it too hard and it slips out of your grasp.
Starting from when I was eight years old I’ve been sick.
I had my first hospitalization and my first feeding tube and my first surgery in the year 2000 at age 10. In 2012 I had a tumor removed from my brain. In 2013 I was life-flighted from my local hospital to Mass General Hospital to have a brain bleed repaired. In 2014 I became so incapacitated by a mystery illness that obviously went deeper than just gastroparesis alone or just a brain tumor alone, or just a neurogenic bladder alone, that I spent 5 months at Mass General hospital getting stabilized and getting tested until we figured out what was wrong with me. In the spring of 2015 I had spent three months at my local hospital for a bowel obstruction … Find Out What Happens Next
Looking like a five- or six-year-old when you’re twelve causes big problems in middle school. When you add to that the fact that the most popular girl in class, Natasha, got a hold of classified information that you spent a week and a half on a children’s psychiatric unit in fifth grade, that’s raising the problem level even higher. If you started sixth grade with a tube coming out of your nose to feed you because there’s something wrong with your stomach, that right there is strike three. It’s game over if you know all the answers to the teacher’s questions and usurp Natasha’s position as the “smartest kid in class.”
The year before, I finished sixth grade early because the teasing and bullying got too brutal for me. I was way ahead academically (despite a developmental delay in other areas) and could have easily skipped a grade or two … Find Out What Happens Next
As a toddler, I spoke before I walked, but I walked right on time too. I hit all my milestones early. My mom had a Master’s degree in early childhood education. She consulted at multiple daycare centers and nursery schools. Some days she would bring me with her to work to show me off. I would ace all of the baby developmental screenings. The other teachers and educators would watch in awe. Back then there was no talk about me having an eating disorder.
In third grade, I began my descent into chronic illness. My skin, hair, and mouth became extremely dry. I started getting frequent pounding headaches.
From kindergarten to the first part of fifth grade, I attended a private Jewish day school, where every day began with a morning prayer service. The Orthodox Jewish Prayer service consists of multiple parts where you remain standing for prolonged periods of … Find Out What Happens Next
